Monday, October 31, 2011

My Guide to Handling Query Letter Rejections

Monday, October 31, 2011
1) Reply to the agent’s email and remind him or her that it’s Opposite’s Day. Be sure to thank the agent for accepting your work.
2) Check the goals from your marketing plan. Your goals should read like this: form rejection or no response on all queries. Then pump your fist, knowing you nailed your goal.
3) Keep a stack of paper beside your computer. Just because it’s an email query, doesn’t mean you have to deprive yourself the joy of crumpling paper and slamming it into the trash can.
4) In your best Arnold-from-Different-Stroke’s voice, say, “Whatcha talkin bout, (insert agent’s name)”
5) Forward to your mother and write “Do you agree, Mom?”
6) Grab your lucky rabbit's foot, rub your tummy counterclockwise, and send out another email query.
7) Wonder if Bill Gates is intercepting your actual acceptance emails and replacing them with the rejections. Not funny, Bill. Not funny at all!
8) For no-reply queries, wonder if the agents at the agency secretly have a cage match scheduled later in the month to see which one of them gets to represent you.
9) As soon as you read it’s a rejection, click to or call your favorite charity and donate a dollar. Your rejections are making the world a better place. Relish that and hope for more.
10) Delete. Smile. Laugh. Dance. Move on!

2 comments:

Michelle 4 Laughs

You gotta find the humor in it or it'll kill you. Hang in there.

scubasteve4

Very true, Michelle. Laughter is best medicine.

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